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In the movie, Lorraine happened to have recently moved to Los Angeles from Wisconsin.
Middle age is when it takes longer to rest than to get tired. Your supply of brain cells is down to a manageable size. So, if this New Year you feel fairly well, Thank Goodness you're alive, though "Old Age is Hell". Our lives were governed by the Ten Commandments, good judgment and common sense.
You have too much room in the house and not enough room in the medicine cabinet. You're getting old when you don't care where your spouse goes, just, as long as you don't have to go along. Liquor is out, can't take a chance; Bladder is weak, might pee in your pants. A belly button ring and a gall bladder surgery scar. Consider the changes we have witnessed: We were before television, penicillin, polio shots, frozen foods, Xerox, contact lenses, Frisbees, plastic and the Pill.
You sink your teeth into a steak and they stay there. You decide to procrastinate but never get around to it. You're 17 around the neck, 44 around the waist, and 250 around the golf course. You remember today that yesterday was your wedding anniversary. Middle age is when work is a lot less fun, and fun a lot more work. Nothing to plan for, nothing to expect, Just the mailman bringing your Old Age Pension cheque. Also, we were before radar, credit cards, split atoms, laser beams, tape recorders, VCR's, ballpoint pens, electric blankets, drip-dry clothes, pantyhose, and before man walked on the moon. And dumb enough to believe that a woman needed a husband in order to have a baby. Until I was 25, I called every man older than I, 'Sir'-and after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, 'Sir.' In our times, closets were for clothes, not for "coming out of." Bunnies were baby rabbits and rabbits were not tiny foreign cars.
You know all the answers, but nobody asks you the questions. You walk with your head high trying to get used to your bifocals. You regret all those mistakes resisting temptation. Your pacemaker makes the garage door go up when you watch a pretty girl go by. Your joints are more accurate at predicting weather than the Weather man. In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either. Sex life is shot, its a thing of the past, Don't kid yourself, friends, even that doesn't last. - Ah, being young may be beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
Your favorite part of the newspaper is "25 Years Ago Today..." You turn out the light for economic reasons rather than romantic ones. After painting the town red, you have to take along rest before applying a second coat. You're startled the first time you are addressed as an old timer. The best part of your day is over when your alarm clock goes off. The little grey haired lady you help across the street is your wife. Can't go to parties, don't dance anymore, Just putting it mildly, you're a hell of a bore. - Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald and have such terrible eyesight, they don't recognize you.
A man has reached middle age when he is cautioned to slow down by his doctor instead of by the police. It is harder and harder for sexual harassment charges to stick 3. Of course I'm against sin; I'm against anything that I'm too old to enjoy. Having a "meaningful relationship" meant getting along with your cousins.